This past July was definitely one of my tougher months this year.

July proved to me that I am strong even when I am weak–as cliché as that may read. I have problems with anxiety and have been dealing with it for a couple of years now. Before, I used to be afraid to speak about anxiety and I had put off going to speak to a doctor for a very long time. This past July, however, I couldn’t put it off any longer. I got to a point where I began to notice how bad my anxiety was getting. It was crazy because I didn’t understand why I was reacting so badly to something that could be thought of as small–like paying a bill. Once I accepted that something was not right of how my body was reacting, I decided to make an appointment to see a doctor.

After speaking to my doctor, I realized that my shortness of breath was due to me hyperventilating. As my doctor continued to state things about what happens to a body when it is having a panic attack, I realized that I was agreeing with many of the symptoms. To my surprise, I have been having panic attacks without even knowing it. I used to simply reason them to something else and managed to surpass them by either stepping outside or crying it out.

That is why I am here. I want to catalog my progress of dealing with anxiety and hopefully be able to see where I stand in a year. I know that in this upcoming year there will be a lot of change to come to my life and I’m excited but at the same time anxious.

I guess there is nothing for me to do but to go along with what life has waiting for me.

-L.L.

 

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